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BMW ANGER - Coggle Diagram
BMW ANGER
How I have responded
Created marriage retreat/ small group/ and documents
Got training in member care and then in clinical counseling
Created First term coaching program
joined care team
Considered heading the department
Wrote review on IBL partnership.
Tried to quit the org
Asked for clarity on goals and my purpose
Offered to help and was rejected
waited patiently
Put the work into healing from my own wonds
offered to do a research project with stipulations
Spent a year studying member care and org development.
ranted to my family and freinds
Tried to build crediablity with new leadership
reached out to Gibbs, Andrew, Liz, Josh, edu guy, zane, vp, Ryan, Frank, and Overly
Suppressed my feelings to org leadership
wanted to quit care team
networked and shared valuable resorces
Feared I was a failure as a teammate and blamed myself that I haven't been trusted or utilized by BMW
Went to counseling to overcome work on my own emotions with Charlie
Found new things to invest in and not hitch my wagon to BMW
Felt responsible to fix BMW to redeem my pain and protect others
Lost faith in BMW as an organization
Personal Experience
On the field
Lack of preparation
Lack of field leadership
NO mmembercare
Harmful messages
Harmful intervention
Lack of support when working in HQ
Watching repeated cycle with friends
On the care team
Mixed messages about how I can help
Inability to communicate with important leaders
unanswered emails
ignored projects
not given clarity of purpose or drrection
not given stratigic influence
not utilized for what I offer
suspect or need to be vetted
not treated fairly as a woman by Frank
Overly never following up with a meeting
feeling like the team is a joke with no real change plan
asked to help with marraiges but never really given influence or follow up and it turned more into organizing a data base secetarry work. No one followed up with the document I proposed or conversations I was trying to start.
Never been invited to teach even when they know I am in town rather utilize me as a nursey worker than a care provider
Rarely meets with me once every month or few months
watched confidentality broken and shared concenrs that I felt were dismissed
First term project left on the table
Contiure to seek a ACBC bend to leadership partnerships
Interactions
BMW OFFERS
Member Care Director
I decided that I didn't have the capacity and credibility to perform this role
Member of Care Team
Attended Care Meetings for 1 and a half months,
Gave feedback about confidentiality concerns
Stopped attending because of scheduling conflicts
Ryan was supposed to follow up individually monthly but this has only happened once in 3 months
Asked for clarity on role in the team
Told to wait until Feb because they cannot answer
Read and discussed a member care book
Marriage Enrichment
Initially asked to have a BMW wide campaign including conferences and raising awareness. But then it just turned into me organizing a database of resources.
No followup
Asked about top marriage issues. I wrote a paper. They just said thanks.
NO FOLLOWUP
Asked for review of IBL Debriefings
Instigated getting a different opinion and wrote a document reccommending that BMW not pursue this partnership for debriefing
Waiting on update from anyone
Consulted me about a trauma counseling situation
Ryan listened to my advice, but outcome unknown
Send Cards to Bereaved
Outcome: I decided not to do this
MY OWN OFFERS over the past 2 years
First term coaching
A.O. never followed up
Andrew says it can't be a priority
Woman author of material questioned
Not informed about JT working on the same thing
Member Care Department Development Consulting
Not invited to be a part of development
Marriage Enrichment Groups
We want to vet it in a 5 week format and change it to fit our org
Networking to have LB become a debriefer
They met with LB but have not followed up with her
Networked with counselor from GFC
They contacted her
Sent videos from school and offered help to network with Dr. Gardner
No response
Sent research articles that pertain to Member Care
Andy O. thanks me for the articles, but never followed up. Ryan then said to just send things to him and no one else
Offered to do my own research project for them
Waiting on responses (+1 month)
Offered to be part of debriefings with Frank and Ryan
No outcome, but told that husband would have to be involved
Offered Stress and Stud workshops
No response
Met with Zane about attrition research
No outcome
Reached out to Andy and the HR director to learn more about the organization
Told not to interact with them
Questions
Is it an option to just quit and if so
Why do I feel so responsible to be a change agent in BMW?
Can I be proud of what I have already done and stop having to prove myself?
Does some of this relate to Steve's shame messages?
What are healthy boundaries?
How should I share with the leadership about these experiences?