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The unhappy man enters your office without knocking and sits down at your…

- - - - You draw your handgun and shoot the man in the hand. “My hand!” screams the man. He falls over and dies. A man asked you for help, and you killed him. That must be why they call you John Problem: The Detective Who Kills People Who Ask Him For Help. You lived up to your name, but you didn’t solve any mysteries. Your life is a mixed bag.
        The End
  - - - My name is Dusty Washcloth," says the unhappy man.
        
        Okay, that's better. Pleased to meet you, Dusty Washcloth. My name is Sam Stonemarrow.
        
        The man nods. With a trembling hand, he raises a highball glass filled with mouthwash to his lips takes a gulp. He gargles the mouthwash and then spits it out all over your desk. It knocks several papers off of your desk. “I gargle with mouthwash when I’m distraught,” the man explains.
        
        Where did you get the mouthwash?
        
        “I brought it from home. I never leave my house without a highball glass filled with mouthwash. That way, if I ever become distraught, I always have something to gargle.”
        
        That's a good plan.
        
        2 more items...
        
        That's the only plan.
        
        Okay, that's better. Pleased to meet you, Dusty Washcloth. My name is John Problem: The detective who kills people who ask him for help.
        
        "John Problem, I need your help," says the unhappy man.
        
        You draw your handgun and shoot the man in the hand. “My hand!” screams the man. He falls over and dies. A man asked you for help, and you killed him. That must be why they call you John Problem: The Detective Who Kills People Who Ask Him For Help. You lived up to your name, but you didn’t solve any mysteries. Your life is a mixed bag.
        The End