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Present Jamie Han (self) - Coggle Diagram
Present Jamie Han (self)
Hobbies
Theater
I have been acting since I was 4 years old. It is probably the only thing in my life that has stayed constant over the years. It is my favorite extracurricular, and I'm saddened that I haven't been able to be as involved in it in college. Theater is my safe space, full of nostalgia and comfort. No matter what role I had, it was always been fun and exciting. My past self would be very surprised that I am not constantly on a stage right now. This has shaped who I am because it was one of the first things that introduced me to a social life besides pre-school. I think the way I behave or respond to friends can be explained by how the kids around me interacted with each other at 4 years old. 
Cross Country
I have been a cross-country runner since I was in elementary school and I loved it. Not to mention I was good at it and frequently out-performed my teammates. It was a way to de-stress and socialize. My parents often referred to it as the way I stayed out of therapy. However, the pandemic halted all practices and I stopped running for a long time. I lost the inherent talent for running and had to rely solely on practicing every day to makeup my endurance and speed. However, when I made up that talent, I was diagnosed with POTS, which increased my heart rate drastically, and I was unable to run competitively for the remainder of my senior year.
Show Choir
I joined show choir during my senior year due to being out of cross country, and I loved it! It was one of the highlights of my senior year and gave me friends I still have today. I was given a major solo for our competition show and loved every second of it. I think this gave me a lot of confidence that I had been missing in my earlier high school years. Working on the show taught me a lot about practice and discipline since show choir shows are judged harshly. Everything has to be perfect to score highly, and my team exceeded those scores: grand champions for every competition. Show Choir was also the first time I did something without my friends or anyone I knew. I auditioned completely for myself, and I think that is what made it special; it was something that I worked hard for.
JMU Athletics
My favorite part about JMU, besides the people and my education, is my internship with the JMU Athletic Department. I used to make video edits of my favorite TV show characters and post them to TikTok. Some of them gained attention, and some didn't, but it was something fun and new to learn at a time when all I had was time. This inspired me to find a career in video editing, which is exactly what I do at the athletic department. I film and edit hype videos for each D1 team, which has been a memorable and informative experience that I want to translate into my future career in being a video editor for documentary teams.
Education
Pandemic
The pandemic was the catalyst for my anxiety and depression. I never had mental health issues or anxiety, but the pandemic brought out a lot of stress in an unmanageable way. I would have panic attacks and mental breakdowns about the news and feel constantly isolated. I was incontrollable and inconsolable. My parents decided to put me in therapy, and I was able to work out a lot of my issues and anxiety by identifying that the root of my anxiety is control. The pandemic also stinted my education in that I never got a true education on world history. I struggled a lot through my sophomore history class because it built off of content I had barely learned. This helped deepen my depression as well as my tendency to compare myself to others because, for the first time, I wasn't getting an "A" in a class. On the flip side, the pandemic sparked my interest in video editing and allowed me to explore a film career.
Highschool
I had the opportunity to go to a high school with a "center" that allowed for a specialized curriculum. My curriculum centered around leadership, government, and global economics. It was a small program, so I learned a lot through my education and also from my peers. My toxic friend group was born of this center, and my tendency to compare myself to others grew from it as well. However, I gained valuable knowledge through seminars, research, and unique classes that weren't offered to students, not in the "center." This allowed me to explore my minors in Legal Studies and Criminal Justice. I would not be the person I am today had I gone to my local high school instead of my "center" one.
3rd Grade
In 3rd grade, students were divided between "GIFTED" kids and "normal" kids. "GIFTED" was a program for students who learned differently to be placed in an environment where they could learn at a different pace. I was a "normal" kid and was made fun of a lot because "GIFTED" was given the reputation that their cohort was more intelligent than the rest of the students. This caused a hefty divide between my third-grade class. My third-grade teacher did an extracurricular assignment called the "Genius Club" and the students who chose to participate in the project had hours of work to do outside of school to win a dinner with the teacher. I was one of 5 people who completed the whole assignment. I beat out 25 GIFTED kids, and it helped me realize that I was capable and smart, as long as I worked hard; no label in the world could define me.
Relationships
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Family
Mom
My mom is my number one supporter and best friend. She taught me how to communicate openly and to trust the people I love. I look up to her a ton because she overcame a lot in her life, so I admire her bravery and try to mimic that bravery in my life. She is my support system, someone I can go to, free of judgment. My mom was the catalyst for me wanting to pursue a film career. She was the one who told me that I should consider working in video editing.
Dad
My dad is one of my biggest supporters. He taught me resilience and security. He was the one who pushed me to not care what other people thought of me. He also made me extremely argumentative and I think that indirectly made me care about what other people think about me. My dad has made me strong in ways that I've never thought of; he keeps me humble and scolds me when I give up, it reminds me of a tough love kind of relationship.
Brother
I love my brother, but he is sometimes the worst thing in the whole world. Growing up with a taller, leaner, and stronger (yet younger) brother was a humbling experience. We were often compared to one another by our peers and teachers, and I think that damaged us both. We both have a superiority complex over the other person that only comes out around each other. But we would do anything for each other and will always be there for one another. I'm appreciative of my relationship with my brother, it taught me how to handle difficult people in life, but also understand that love, especially familial love, is not always easy.
Extended Family
I love my extended family, however, a lot of my educational stress has stemmed from them. All of my cousins went to selective universities and Ivy Leagues to achieve great success in education, occupation, and even in their family. I have always compared myself to them and their happiness, and a huge part of my anxiety comes from not living up to who they are, even if they show me support and love.
Dylan
Dylan is my thoughtful boyfriend of 7 months. I love him very much as we were close friends before dating. We differ in many aspects, including in fundamental ways like religion and family, however, no matter how often we "spat", we communicate and listen to each other. Dylan has helped me realize so much about myself in that I like having a little bit of fire in a relationship. I've also realized what my fundamental beliefs are and how I want to let those affect the kind of parent I want to be. I've learned through my relationship with Dylan what kind of parent and partner I want to and am going to be.
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Geography
Tennessee
I moved to Tennessee when I was very young, so for a long time I thought I was born in Nashville. I didn't have many friends at school, but I also wasn't old enough to care; I just colored and played with my mom. My brother was born here, so I always played with him at home instead of my neighbors. A lot of my childhood began in Tennessee: the first Christmases, birthdays, and playdates that I could remember happened here. I consider this the first time I had an emotional attachment to something semi-permanent. I cried for days over leaving our house because I didn't want to hurt the house's feelings. And even now I feel that with our current house in Virginia.
Virginia
I have lived in Virginia for most of my life. It is where I was born, grew up, and now go to college. I am a history buff, so I love living in a historic state. There are always things to do in Virginia, so I think living here has shaped how I view social events. I also used to think that Virginia was a state of only Korean people because before I moved to Virginia, I had only been there to see my extended family (who is Korean). So I was reluctant to accept the move because I thought I would have to learn a new language and adapt to a culture I barely knew, all because I had a skewed image of what the population would be like based on a small sample. I chose one of my senior photos to accompany this segment of my life because it was taken on the steps of the Virginia State Capitol building.
South Korea
My dad and most of my extended family are from Seoul, South Korea. This plays a huge part in the person I am because I am half Korean but have very little connection to that part of my heritage. As a biracial child, it is hard to connect to my culture because it doesn't makeup who I am entirely. I eat Korean food and celebrate some traditions. However, I rarely see my family and don't speak the language. My dad refused to teach me how to speak Korean, so I missed the developmental stage to learn it. I am unable to speak with my grandparents, and my peers often made fun of me for not being bilingual in high school. It caused me to go into an identity crisis and no one in my family could understand how I was feeling because everyone belonged to their culture.
JMU
Going to JMU was never my first choice. To me, it was a safety school, a place that overachieving students apply to "just in case". Fortunately for me, I was rejected from all my top schools. Although I was upset and hesitant to fall in love with JMU, I couldn't help but love it. It was absolutely the best option for me and I believe that if I had gone anywhere else, I would be far less happy and far less successful.
Politics
Politics is an inter-branch branch. Politics plays a huge role in my life because it exists everywhere: in my education, everyday life, parents, and fundamental beliefs. My family, education, role models, and friends influence what I believe in. Politics is what broke up some of my early friendships in high school, but also brought me closer to understanding the power of being informed. During my senior year of high school, I participated in a research project centered around understanding the Constitution. It got me involved in asking questions about our government and political structure. I want to translate this into my career and hopefully highlight the good and bad about our democratic republic.