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W13 - Meg John Barker Chap 8, 3 + 13.4 INTERPERSONAL APPROACH TO…
W13 - Meg John Barker
Chap 8, 3 + 13.4
INTERPERSONAL APPROACH
TO CONFLICT
ESCALATION OF CONFLICTS & VICIOUS CIRCLES
DEFINITION p.67
INCREASINGLY TENSE BCAUSE EACH RESPONSE TRIGGERS THE OTHER PERSON
'STHG WRONG' BECOMES
PERSONALITY FLAW
TRONGER TENSION
AT EACH CONFLICT
John Gottman &
THE LOVE LAB p.67
BAD RS
4 HORSEMEN
(dynamics) p.68
CRITICISM
DEFENSIVENESS
STONEWALLING
CONTEMPT
GOOD RS
MAGIC RATIO = AT LEAST
5X + POSITIVE INTERACTIONS
THAN NEGATIVE ONES
EXISTENTIAL APPROACH
(based on existential philosophy)
CONFLICT IS
UNAVOIDABLE
SARTRE
p.70
PPL IN TENSION BTW
FREEDOM AND
OTHERS EXPECTAT°
2 WAYS OUT
(fear of freedom)
OBJECTIFY OTHERS
TRY MAKE SB FIT
YOUR EXPECTAT°
OBJECTIFY YOURSELF
MAKE YOURSELF
WHAT THE OTHER
WANTS YOU TO BE
YOU CAN NEVER
COMPLETELY OBJECTIFY
CAUSE YOU'RE FREE
OTHERS RESIST OBJ
OR HURT
YOU FEEL RESENTMENT
OR LOSS
SIMONE DE
BEAUVOIR
p.71
CAN GET OUT
RECOGNISE
MUTUALITY
INTERDEPDT
TO REACH GOALS
EMPATHY ESSENTIAL
EMBRACE NEED FOR
FREEDOM & INDEPENDENCE
RECOGNISE
VULNERABILITIES
(Cannon & Lindberg)
