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CHAPTER 4 : LISTENING IN INTERPERSONAL COMMUNICATION - Coggle Diagram
CHAPTER 4 : LISTENING IN INTERPERSONAL COMMUNICATION
Hearing & Listening
Listening
is an interpersonal skill as critical as the skill of speaking
Hearing
is a physical ability
Personal Benefits
Satisfy basic human needs of being heard and being werid
Good listeners do not "get taken" very often
Open doors for ideas thus encourage creativity
Purposes of human communication
:one:
To learn
Learn and understand other people
:two:
To influence
People who are influential in your life are very likely the people who listen, know and understand you
:three:
To help
Listen to other's concern
:four:
To play
Referred to as appreciate listening would include all those listening experiences where your purpose is primarily enjoyment
:five:
To relate
To gain social acceptance and popularity and to make people like us
Increase job satisfaction
Effective listeners are constantly learning
Professional benefits
of listening is establish and communicate power
Good listening skill make workers more productive
better comprehend the projects they are assigned
Build strong rapport with coworkers, managers and clients
Styles of Effective Listening
Surface versus Depth Listening
Surface listening
In most messages there's an obvious meaning that you can derive from surface listening - a literal reading of the words and sentences
Depth listening
On one level, the message is obvious
But depth listening can reveal another, perhaps more important level
Polite versus Impolite listening
Polite listening
You will want to listen politely and you will want to express this politeness through your listening behavior
Impolite listening
You would not want to listen politely. Example when someone is being verbally abusive
Nonjudgmental versus Critical Listening
Listen judgmentally
With open mind with a view toward understanding
Critical Listening
With a view toward making some kind of evaluation or judgment
Active versus Inactive Listening
Function of Active Listening
Helps you as a listener to check your understanding of what the speaker said
Stimulates the speaker to explore feelings and thoughts
Four types of messages send solutions that you should avoid in your active listening
Ordering messages
Warning and threatening messages
Preaching and moralizing messages
Advising messages
Techniques of Active Listening
Paraphrase the speaker's meaning
Express understanding of the speaker's feeling
Ask questions
Empathic versus Objective Listening
Emphatic listening
To understand what a person means and feels, listen with some degree of empathy the feeling of another's feeling
Objective Listening
To go beyond empathy and measure meanings and feelings against some objective reality
The Process of Listening
Stage 3 : Remembering
:silhouette: Memory
:silhouette: Memory for speech is not reproducible; you do not just repeat what the speaker said in your mind
:silhouette: False memory syndrome is a condition in which a person "remembers" prior events that never happened
Stage 4 : Evaluating
:silhouette: Critical thinking
:silhouette: Judging the message
:silhouette: You may try to evaluate the speaker's underlying intentions or motives
Stage 2 : Understanding
:silhouette: Learning
:silhouette: A stage which you learn what the speaker means grasp the thoughts and emotional tone expressed
:silhouette: General suggestion
prepare yourself to listen, avoid distractions, pay special attention to the introduction, take notes in outline from, assume relevance, listen for understanding
Stage 5 : Responding
:silhouette: Competence in giving feedback
:silhouette: While the speaker is speaking, your response should be encouraging and acknowledge that you are listening to the speaker
:silhouette: Responses given after the speaker has ceased speaking are usually more extensive and may include expressions of empathy
Stage 1 : Receiving
:silhouette: Attention and concentration
:silhouette: Listening begins with receiving the messages the speaker sends, verbal and nonverbal
:silhouette: Popular disclaimers
hedging, credentialing, sin licenses, cognitive disclaimers, appeals for the suspension of judgement
Bad listening habits
:!: Faking attention
:!: Allowing disruptions
:!: Overlistening
:!: Dismissing subjects as uninteresting
:!: Stereotyping
:!: Failing to observe nonverbal aids
Problem-causing Listening Response
Listener type
:warning:
The static listener
Gives no feedback, reveals no expression
:warning:
The monotonous feedback giver
Seems responsive, but the responses never vary
:warning:
The overly expressive listener
Reacts to just about everything with extreme responses
:warning:
The reader/writer
While 'listening' reads or writes, only occasionally glances up
:warning:
The eye avoider
Looks all around the room and at others but never at you
:warning:
The preoccupied listener
Listens to other things at the same time, often with headphones with the sound so loud that it interferes with your own thinking
:warning:
The waiting listener
Listens for a cue to take over the speaking turn
:warning:
The thought-completing listener
Listens a little and then finishes your thought