This means that the counsellor accurately understands the client's (mother’s) thoughts, feelings and meanings from the mother's own perspective.

When the counsellor perceives what the world is like from the mother’s point of view, it demonstrates that her view has value and also that the mother is accepted.

When mothers contact us, there are a number of ways we can help them. Often all we need to do as ABA counsellors is simply give them reassurance.

Mothers may simply need to hear that what they are going through is normal, that many mothers feel like they do and that these feelings of anxiety do lessen with time and contact with other mothers.

In most situations, the role of the breastfeeding counsellor includes validating and reassuring the mother and connecting her if possible to her local group so she can gain continuing support through contact with other mothers in similar situations.

As well as needing reassurance, many mothers need to feel accepted. In so many other aspects of their lives they may find themselves being judged in relation to their parenting ability, lifestyle choices or reactions to the changes going on in their lives.

As counsellors, a key aspect of our role is to communicate in an accepting and non-judgmental manner. For some mothers acceptance and reassurance is all that they need in order to be able to continue on their own.