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Verbal Abuse - Coggle Diagram
Verbal Abuse
Types of Verbal Abuse
Gaslighting
For example:
You recall an event, agreement, or argument and the abuser denies that it happened at all. They may tell you it’s all in your mind, you dreamed it, or are making it up.
They tell other people that you’re forgetful or have emotional problems to solidify the illusion.
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Withholding or isolation
For example:
At a friend’s house, you say or do something they don’t like. Without a word, they storm out and sit in the car, leaving you to explain and say goodbye to your hosts.
They know you need to communicate about who’s picking up the kids, but they refuse to answer your calls or texts.
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Circular arguments
For example:
Your job requires you to put in overtime without notice. Every time it happens, the argument about your tardiness starts anew.
You’ve made it clear that you’re not ready for kids, but your partner brings it up every month.
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Accusations
For example:
“I saw the way you looked at them. You can’t tell me there’s nothing going on there.”
“Why won’t you give me your cell phone if you’ve got nothing to hide?”
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Threats
For example:
“When you come home tonight, you might find a ‘for sale’ sign on the lawn, and I might just be gone with the kids.”
“If you do that, no one would blame me for how I’d react.”
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Name Calling
For example:
“You don’t get it, sweetie, because you’re just too dumb.”
“It’s no wonder everyone says you’re a jerk.”
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Blame
For example:
“I hate getting into fights, but you make me so mad!”
“I have to yell, because you’re so unreasonable and thickheaded!”
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Manipulation
For example:
“If you do that, it proves you don’t care about your family and everyone will know it.”
“You’d do this for me if you really loved me.”
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Criticism
For example:
“You’re always upset about something, always playing the victim. That’s why nobody likes you.”
“You screwed up again. Can’t you do anything right?”
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Condescension
For example:
“Let me see if I can put this in simple terms that even you can understand.”
“I’m sure you put a lot of effort into your makeup, but go wash it off before someone sees you.”
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Degradation
For example:
“Before I came along you were nothing. Without me you’ll be nothing again.”
“I mean, look at yourself. Who else would want you?”
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