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Managing Conflict in Interpersonal Relationships (Approaches to Conflict,…
Managing Conflict in Interpersonal Relationships
Communication Climates in Interpersonal Relationships
Communication Climate: The emotional tone of a relationship as it is expressed in the message that the partners send and receive.
Confirming and Disconfirming Messages
Confirming Messages: Actions and words that express respect and show that we value the other person
Show recognition
Acknowledge the person's thoughts and feeling
Show that you agree
Disconfirming Messages: Words and actions that express a lack of caring or respect for another person.
Partners criticize each other
Partners show contempt
Partners are defensive
One or both partners engage in stonewalling
How Communication Climates Develop
Relational spiral: A reciprocal communication pattern in which each person's message reinforces the other's
Escalatory sprials: A reciprocal communication pattern in which messages, either confirming or disconfirming, between two or more communicators reinforce one another.
Avoid spiral: A communication spiral in which the parties slowly reduce their dependence on one another, withdraw, and become less invested in the relationship.
Understanding Interpersonal Conflict
Expressed struggle
Interdependence
Perceived incompatible goals.
Perceived scarce resources
Managing Interpersonal Conflicts
Methods for Conflict Resolution
Win-lose problem solving: An approach to conflict resolution in which one party reaches his or her goal at the expense of the other.
Lose-lose problem solving: An approach to conflict resolution in which neither party achieves its goals
Compromise: An approach to conflict resolution in which both parties attain at least part of what they seek by giving something up.
Win-win problem solving: An approach to conflict resolution in which the parties work together to satisfy all their goals.
Steps in Win-Win Problem Solving
Identify your problem
2.Explore your unmet needs
Make a date
Describe your problem and needs
Check you partner's understanding
Solicit you partner's needs
7.Check your understanding of your partner's needs
Discuss ways to meet you common goals
Follow up on the solution
Approaches to Conflict
Styles of Expressing Conflict
Nonassertion: The inability or unwillingness to express one's thoughts or feelings.
Indirect communication: Hinting at a message instead of expressing thoughts and feelings directly.
Passive aggression
Pseudoaccommodators pretend to agree with you
Guiltmakers try to make you feel bad
Jokers use humor as a weapon
Trivial tyrannizers do small things to drive you crazy
Withholders keep back something valuable.
Direct aggression: A message that attacks the position and perhaps the dignity of the receiver
Characteristics of an Assertive Message
Describe the behavior in question
Share you interpretation of the other person's behavior
Describe your feelings
Describe the consequences
State you intentions
Gender and Conflict Style
Origins of Gender Differences
Conflict Dilemmas
Commonalities
Culture Influences on Conflict
Conflict in Online Communication
Delay, Dis-inhibition, Permanence