seduction. :kissing_heart:: (Ch.2) (Three steps to achieving your goal. …
seduction. :kissing_heart:: (Ch.2)
IMPORTANT: Fight vs. an Argument :!!:
There's a difference between an argument and a fight.
In a fight a opinion "wins" over the others while in an argument one persuades another to chooses your opinion. :crown:
An argument has more of an long term affect unlike like a fight which is only a temporary fix.
John Gottman, a research psychologist, did a study with University of Washington about the survival of marriages :wedding:
He had the couples film all there arguments :film_projector:
The couples who stayed together for nine year and those who divorced argued the same amount
The couples who lasted augured while the those who split fought.
Proving that when a disagreement happens it's best to solve it by arguing because it's more likely to last
Three steps to achieving your goal.
changing your audiences emotion makes them more vulnerable to your argument. Think of it as you found the key to there ears :key::ear:
The first goal out of the three persuasive steps. Said to be the easiest.
Second of the three steps. Usually only will only have two choices
Forcing them to decide with your opinion. the "Right" opinion :check:
An example of this is a sales person selling people picture frames wants the most sold frame to be a blue frame
while he is selling the blue frame he is more enthusiasm when he talks.
This tone lead you to the "right" choice.
Desire to act
This is where the audience makes its own decision to continue something or to stop
Heninrichs suggest using desire or making your argument seem less like a chore and more like an easy ten minute task.
The last out of the three, level: 5 difficulty
Make your realistic goal
keep in mind how you must change for different audiences
Sometimes arguing is like a game; both you and you competitor can score points. when you opponent scores point it doesn't hurt your case completely, it can even help.
Heinrichs, gives the example of the cop. :cop: Your goal is to not get a ticket. By admitting to the cop you understand your wrong doings and ask a way to fix, the cop gains a point but it also puts him in a better mood.
The cop gets to show his knowledge by answering your question. this shows him that you are willing to fix the problem and respect his opinion.
By doing so you allowed him to gain a few point but in the end you have a better chance of achieving your goal. :forbidden: :ticket:
Completely defeating your opponent: completing your goal with ease, no losing points.