《Co-active
Coaching》
個案
行為
Fullfillment
Balance
Process
fundamental to the liveliness of life.
it makes more sense to look at whether coachees are moving toward balance or away from balance rather than to offer them “balance” as a goal to be achieved.
Listening
Coaching
Skills
Articulating
Clarifying
3
levels
"it sounds like you need to decide (a) whether you want that job at all, and (b) whether it’s worth uprooting your life to have it, and then maybe (c) whether the relationship is sustainable. Or something like that."
Meta-view
Get in the imaginary helicopter with the coachee, take it up to about 10,000 feet, and look down on the coachee’s life.
presents the big picture and opens up room for perspective.
“What do you see from up here?
let’s push the pause button for a moment. In the big picture of this project—and with your desire (to take more initiative and more leadership)—what’s your biggest challenge?
Meta-view is a useful way to provide context, especially when the situation makes it easy to be drawn into the details of a problem.
Metaphor
“Are you drifting in a fog?” creates a picture, an experience that engages the coachee at a very different level than “Are you confused?” which addresses the coachee’s intellect.
Acknowledging
By way of contrast, praise and compliments highlight what people do: “Good job on that report, Janet.” Or the opinion of the person.
Acknowledgment recognizes the inner character of the person
“Janet, you really showed your commitment to learning.” “You took a big risk.” “I can see your love of beauty in it.”
“You made it really fun for yourself.”
“I see a person who consistently takes a stand for honesty and authenticity—and it wasn’t easy.”
Intuition
Chap.4
phrase it
I have a sense . . .
May I tell you about a gut feeling I have?
I have a hunch that . . .
Can I check something out with you?
I wonder if . . .
See how this fits for you.
My intuition tells me . . .
intruding
What will change the game?
What will it take to break the cycle?
Let’s start with this: what do you both care about?
“What did that mean to you?”
“What did you learn from that?”
“I’m going to interrupt here.”
Curiosity
Chap.5
Using Powerful Questions
Look ahead six months. Standing there, what decisions would you make today?
What does success look (or feel) like?
What’s next?
What about that is important to you?
What else?
What did you learn?
What will you do?
When will you do it?
Who do you need to be?
It is not so you can hear the answer; it is so the coachees can hear the answer and learn from it.
Homework
What is the underlying yearning?
What are you here to do? /To create?
What are you resisting?
What is it to be inspired?
might use the inquiry as a screensaver, or choose a key word from the inquiry as a log-on password for a week or two.
by writing in a journal, drawing pictures, talking to a friend, or going for a walk.
At the end of our last session, I gave you a question to ponder that could have many different answers at different levels.
Where else do you abandon yourself?
What else did you discover with the question?
Was that true for you, too?
Is there more?
Where do you take an uncompromising stand?
Where do you take an uncompromising stand?
Forward &
Deepen
What will you do?
Chap.6
When will you do it? (Or on what schedule,
How will I know? (Or ask how the coachee will track his or her progress
Structure
Wall Chart
specific clothing─
magic armor
create
deadlines
home party
for cleaning house
create rewards
Self-
management
Let’s be honest.
Chap.7
these disruptive experiences are part of learning and growing stronger as a coach and a person.
What is the truth in that for me?
What’s in that for me to learn?
ritual before the appointment.
you could give yourself a few minutes of quiet reflection, recalling to mind your intent or purpose.
It could be as simple as reviewing your notes from the most recent coaching session.
What will best serve this employee—now and in the future?
The approach to the presenting opportunity is a balance of What is there to learn here? as well as What is there to fix?
don’t make it a rule that you will never share an opinion or a bit of advice.
Skills
Recovery
- Notice it
- Name it
Describe what just happened:
- Reconnect
it is the process of turning your attention back over to your coachee—that Level II connection, engaged and present.
to ask permission
to remind coachees that they are in charge of the coaching direction
“May we work with this issue?”
“Can I tell you what I see?”
“Would you like some feedback on that?”
it demonstrates that coachees have power in the relationship.
the coach knows the limits of his or her power in the relationship.
allows coachees to take responsibility for managing the relationship and their work.
“May I tell you what I see about the way you’ve been handling this?”
Bottom-lining is the skill of getting to the point
明確有力地表達
Champion
“You are so committed to this. I know you can do it.” Or “You’ve shown over and over how you can be caring and firm. You can do it again.” Or “You have the creative gifts—in abundance. You can do this.”
You see them at the finish line, the top of the hill, goals accomplished.
Clearing
“You seem really blocked. Let’s take a couple of minutes to get this out. Really complain, whine, feel sorry for yourself. Exaggerate.”
“Turn up the volume. What else happened? And then what? How did that feel? What a jerk! Tell me more.”
You seem distracted. It sounds like you need to clear that before we can move on.
Ouch. What else? Let’s turn up the volume.
Go for it. What else?
You feel like you let your family down. . . . What else?
So you’ve got a judgment—“should have seen this coming.” What else?
There you are in emptiness. What’s next?
Is there more? Is this the issue you want to be working on today?
Chap.8
each coaching session, there is an issue to work on, plans to make, goals to define, and accountability to create action and learning.
Defining life purpose
about self-discovery, values clarification, and vision.
Values Clarification
Ask coachees to describe the values they see in their own lives,
Almost any life situation can be used to mine for values,
“Where is this value showing up?”
“What values do you sometimes neglect?”
“Which are the values you will not compromise?”
對你而言，什麼是重要的？
another fruitful exercise is to ask the coachee to prioritize the values,
the greatest joy or deepest satisfaction: be with the people you love, use your natural talents, exploit your gifts to their fullest.
What is the hunger I am here to feed? Where is the pain I can ease? What is the teaching I am called to do? Where is the building I have the tools to accomplish?
Life purpose is
not motivated by circumstances, fear, or a corrupted sense of duty.
Dissonance
A common theme is that our fear is stronger than our desire for fulfillment.
Be aware that whenever people take the initiative to change their lives, an alarm sounds and the saboteur will awaken. Expect it. You can even forewarn your coachees.
but it is often overcautious at a time that calls for risks for the sake of change and a more fulfilling life.
which leads to self-sabotage
Chap.9
They want to feel they are choosing their life, not just reacting to it.
two levels:
the day-to-day experience.
the underlying quality of life
Balance is not about evening out everything.
life is inherently dynamic. We are constantly balancing.
The coachee’s point of view is often the main contributing factor to the blocked, stuck, or spinning feeling.
Coachees learn to be more adept at seeing the boxes that hold them in, and the patterns of their own obstruction.
What they learn by breaking out of those boxes serves them in other areas.
The truth is, there are things that coachees—or leaders for that matter—simply do not have control over.
“What do you have control over? What choices are possible?”
5 steps
(1) perspectives,
(2) choice,
(3) co-active strategy,
(4) commitment,
(5) action
is to identify the coachee’s perspective and then expand the perspectives that are available.
each perspective is a world of its own,
As humans, we tend to limit what is possible by what we believe is true,
naming it and exploring the impact of holding it.
What is another way of looking at this that would work for you?
How would a five-year-old see this?
What is the “good news” perspective?
Or choose one of the coachee’s values: Adventure is a value of yours. What if you looked at this as a grand adventure?
Perception is reality.
Eventually, the coachee will need to choose a perspective—one of the perspectives you have been playing with, a combination of perspectives, or even an entirely new perspective that came out of the exploration.
“Choice” at this step is also an affirmation of the power of choice itself.
aware that there are real and distinct possibilities to choose from is liberating and empowering.
Coachees are no longer victims of circumstances over which they have no control.
How coachees choose will be valuable background for you
Does the coachee choose quickly? Impulsively? Is there a great deal of analysis or a complex system for comparing and analyzing?
includes the attitude and emotional state that motivates and supports action.
the coach’s job is to encourage coachees to push the edge of possibilities,
the intention is to redefine what “possible” means,
past what is normally considered “realistic.”
“realistic” is a perspective and could be a self-limiting way of looking at the situation at hand.
It’s so easy to slip back into old habits.
What sustains change over time?
The energy of commitment is one answer.
As a coach, you want this awakened strategy to live inside, in the coachee’s muscle and bone, not only in the brain. So before you invite coachees to take action, make sure they’ve really made a commitment to their plans.
In fact, this act of commitment is so powerful that the coach sometimes asks coachees to actually draw a line—real or imaginary—on the floor in front of them, take a deep breath, and, when they’re ready to commit to the plan, step across the line.
But only when they’re truly ready to commit.
As coachees prepare to commit to action, they must choose between saying yes to their plans and saying no to something else.
As coach, listen for the depth of the yeses and nos from your coachees. You may even ask them to take part in this yes-or-no exercise for a period of time as a way to get clearer about the root choices they are making.
follow up
Taking action without harvesting the learning is merely activity or busyness.
Chap.10
The goal of process coaching is
(1) the coach senses the turbulence under the surface and names it,
(2) the coach explores it,
(3) the coachee experiences it,
(4) a shift happens,
(5) energy opens up,
(6) the coachee has access to new resources,
(7) movement happens.
“It sounds to me like there’s something important here about the way you were treated.”
give them the opportunity to become aware and conscious of the impact these issues really have on their lives.
first you must ask the coachee for permission.
creates a container of safety and encourages them to look deeper than the surface details of the presenting issue.
It’s both responsible and respectful of the other person’s feelings in the moment.
Simply noticing the obvious—that there is something more going on than the topic itself—and asking if it’s okay to talk about it,
to enhance the ability of coachees to be aware of the moment and to name it.
to focus on what is true in the moment.
One of the most effective access points for exploring the moment is the coachee’s immediate physical experience:
Metaphor or imagery is another effective access point
the coachee actually experience the sensation or emotion.
Emotion has powerful energy in it. When that emotion is blocked, the energy builds behind the walls, sometimes driven down and pressed into corners.
Process coaching unblocks that stuck energy
Unblocked energy creates motion.
releasing that energy for the work that matters most to coachees.
Emotions
to Encourage it!
The cause itself is not important; accepting the feeling is important.
Just explore it and acknowledge it: “That’s a powerful feeling. There’s some pain in there; I can tell.”
discover more about themselves and become more resourceful,
“What’s one thing that’s hard to be with? Let’s exclude that from the picture.” Draw a small shape inside the circle and give it a name, and continue that process.
What areas in your life are hard for you to be with or explore?
to the coachee rather than to the coachee’s issue.
Co-Active Training Institute (CTI)
Phillip Sandahl
Phillip@TeamCoachingInternational.com or teamcoachinginternational.com.
20/10/14
finished
reading
different
view points
(1)不同角色/(2)時空/(3)不同角色&時空的搭配
上、中、下
更寬廣/
更細節
前、中、後
如果你要給這個行為
一個名字，你會給它什麼名字？
請問你的生命中，
可以有「誇張」出現嗎？
偶像
年輕時候的
Meta-view
Get in the imaginary helicopter with the coachee, take it up to about 10,000 feet, and look down on the coachee’s life.
“What do you see from up here?
Meta-view is a useful way to provide context, especially when the situation makes it easy to be drawn into the details of a problem.
let’s push the pause button for a moment. In the big picture of this project—and with your desire (to take more initiative and more leadership)—what’s your biggest challenge?
???
Look ahead six months. Standing there, what decisions would you make today?
如果我們把這抗拒的力量移走
的話，你真正想做的是什麼？
OK的人是不會
需要跟人說的
對方/
自己
儀式
告別式
就由第一句開始，「她是我的媽媽...」
中立的
請寫下他來你告別式
會說的一番話
請寫下你去他告別式
會說的一番話
請寫下你對他
會說的一番話
的回應
多了什麼？
少了什麼？
自己
你要跟這個累的
自己說什麼？
對方的角度
你怎麼看(給計劃，
但不想去做的)自己
是他聽不懂，還是
你沒想讓他聽懂？
視覺化
What’s next?
Clearing
“You seem really blocked. Let’s take a couple of minutes to get this out. Really complain, whine, feel sorry for yourself. Exaggerate.”
“Turn up the volume. What else happened? And then what? How did that feel? What a jerk! Tell me more.”
You seem distracted. It sounds like you need to clear that before we can move on.
Ouch. What else? Let’s turn up the volume.
Go for it. What else?
You feel like you let your family down. . . . What else?
So you’ve got a judgment—“should have seen this coming.” What else?
There you are in emptiness. What’s next?
Is there more? Is this the issue you want to be working on today?
用盡全力
Structure
Wall Chart
specific clothing─
magic armor
create
deadlines
home party
for cleaning house
create rewards
很久遠以後
現在的自己回去陪伴當時的自己
another exercise：每一項value在生活中體現的程度分數
、雙椅工作、演出角色、小型演劇
神仙婆婆
智慧老人
神仙教母
換位思考
守護神
想像你有一個守護神(fairy godmother)，
而Mr. Klutz(個案稱呼)剛好割傷自己或撞
傷，或從單車上跌下來，守護神此時出
現了，他會對你說什麼？
about coachees using their talents as well as the unique learning of their lives, their experience, and their wisdom.