Understanding Human Communication: Chapter 8 (Understanding Interpersonal…
Understanding Human Communication:
Understanding Interpersonal Conflict
-Parties in a conflict are dependent on eachother. The welfare and satisfaction of one depend on the actions of another.
Perceived incompatible goals
-Goals are often not as oppositional as they seem. Solutions may exist that allow both parties to get what they want. However, most people fail to see mutually satisfying answers to their problems.
-Both parties are aware that the conflict exists. It could be shown in words or nonverbal cues.
A personal example is with my neighbors. My dogs bark a lot and it results in my neighbors slamming their door. They are expressing their frustration with nonverbal cues and in turn, I let my dogs inside.
Perceived scarce resources
-Time and money are both perceived as scare commodities. It is important to pay attention to the ways in which you can manage conflicts effectively and efficiently.
: An expressed struggle between at least two interdependent parties who perceive incompatible goals, scare rewards, and interference from the other party in achieving their goals.
Communication Climates in Interpersonal Relationships
The emotional tone of a relationship as it is expressed in the messages that the partners send and receive.
Confirming and Disconfirming Messages
Actions and words that express respect and show that we value the other person.
. Acknowledge the person's thoughts and feelings.
. Show that you agree.
. Show recognition.
Words and actions that express a lack of caring or respect for another person.
. Partners criticize eachother.
is a message that is personal, all encompassing, and accusatory.
. Partners show contempt.
is verbal and nonverbal messages that ridicule or belittle the other person.
Partners are defensive.
is protecting oneself by counterattacking the other person.
One or both parties engage in stonewalling.
is refusing to engage with the other person.
How Communication Climates Develop
: A reciprocal pattern of communication in which messages, either confirming or disconfirming, between two or more communicators reinforce one another.
: A communication spiral in which the parties slowly reduce their dependence on one another, withdraw, and become less invested in the relationship.
: A reciprocal communication pattern in which each person's message reinforces the other's.
- This affect is captured by the old saying, "what goes around comes around."
Approaches to Conflict
Styles of Expressing Conflict
: An indirect expression of aggression, delivered in a way that allows the sender to maintain a facade of kindness.
: A message that attacks the position and perhaps the dignity of the receiver.
: Hinting at a message instead of expressing thoughts and feelings directly.
I can't stand indirectness or passive aggression. I value when people are direct and assertive.
: A style of communicating that directly expresses the sender's needs, thoughts, or feelings, delivered in a way that does not attack the receiver.
: The inability or unwillingness to express one's thoughts or feelings.
Characteristics of an Assertive Message
Describe your feelings.
Describe the consequences.
Share your interpretation of the other person's behavior.
State your intentions.
. Describe the behavior in question.
Managing Interpersonal Conflicts
Methods for Conflict Resolution
Lose-lose Problem Solving:
An approach to conflict resolution in which neither party achieves its goals.
An approach to conflict resolution in which both parties attain at least part of what they seek by giving something up.
Win-lose Problem Solving
: An approach to conflict resolution in which one party reaches his or her goal at the expense of another.
Win-win Problem Solving
: An approach to conflict resolution in which the parties work together to satisfy all their goals.