Please enable JavaScript.
Coggle requires JavaScript to display documents.
Friendship & Romantic Relationships (Theories of Relationships…
Friendship & Romantic Relationships
Importance
The centrality of human contact to human functioning --> Victor, the wild boy of Aveyron found at 12 y/o
Never learned to talk or social conventions - social deficits & ill-adjustments
Harlow et al
Rhesus Monkeys
Isolated with mother surrogates - one wire with bottle, one cloth
Preferred the
cloth mother = comfort
--> attachment theory
At adolescence - fearful, not interacting with peers not good mothers
Admiral Byrd
Volunteered to be isolated to observe the effect of no social contact
Week 4 - Lonely, lost & bewildered
Week 9 - Religious questioning & meaning of life
Month 3 - Severely depressed, hallucinations
Loneliness
Prevalence of Loneliness
Beutel et al.
10-45% of Americans report regular loneliness --> highest in teens & young adults
No direct relationship between contact time & loneliness
Physical consequences
for lack of social support - Gender differences in divorce --> Greater impact of men
Lack of Social Support
Woman --> develop
closer friendships
after divorce
Men --> Less support - maybe they don't seek support
Hospital admission is 3-23x higher for divorced than married people for
psychological issues
(Bloom et al.)
Higher
suicide rates
(single & divorced)
(Griffiths)
Loneliness = Risk factor for
cognitive decline & depression
(James) (Cacioppo)
Higher
mortality rates (26%)
(Lynch)
Comparable risk to
smoking 15 cigarettes a day
--> life shortened by 8 years
(Holt-Lunstad)
Linked to developing
heart disease & stroke
(Valtorta)
Gender Differences
Men more likely to commit suicide & have worse physical & mental state
(Rendall)
--> women may benefit from separation
(Dittami)
In friendships: Men = more
emotionally dependent
on partner & have fewer alternative support sources
Asked - "who would you turn to when depressed" - 71% men said wife, 39% of women said husband
(General Survey
)
Men more likely to have
casual friendships
with other men - women more likely to have
close relationships
with other women
(Rubin)
--> wider support networks
(Grambs)
Social Support
Schachter et al.
PPs told they'd receive shocks --> 1/2 told they were
strong (high anxiety)
& 1/2
weak (low anxiety)
Given option of waiting
alone or with others
63% of high anxiety group chose to
remain together
, 33% - low anxiety
Types (Stroebe)
Emotional
- Feeling loved
Evaluation
- Help make up mind about things
Information
- Factual things - suggestions & advice
Instrumental
- Concrete help
Reasons for affiliating (Hill)
Receive emotional support
Reduce uncertainty through comparing with others
Be positivity stimulated
Obtain confirmation & recognition
Theories of Relationships (AIRFARES)
A Fundamental Human Need to Belong - Baumeister & Leary
Evolution
An evolutionary basis for seeking relationships - need to belong is
universal & guides social cognition
We actually NEED other people for survival - as much as we need food etc.
Long-term
romantic bands
evolved to facilitate reproduction & to
raise offspring
who are vulnerable & dependent for many years
Parent offspring attachments help ensure that infants are protected & will survive until they become dependent
(Bowlby)
Friendship
evolved as a means for non-kin cooperation which increases the chances of
survival through cooperation
(Trivers)
Need to Belong is Universal
Guides Social Cognition
Satiable
Wheeler et al:
Studies show that the vast majority of the average students' meaningful interactions are with the same
6 people
There will be
profound negative consequences
if the need is not met
Attachment Theory (Bowlby)
Early attachments with caregivers shape our relationships for the rest of our lives
If caregivers are available & responsive children will develop confidence that caregivers are a secure base
Children develop
working models
of themselves (beliefs about lovability & competence) & of relationships --> Beliefs about
other people's availability, warmth & ability to provide security
Attachment Styles - (Ainsworth)
The Strange Situation
Secure
= Easy to get close to others, comfortable with mutual dependence, good self worth
Avoidant
= Uncomfortable being close, difficult to trust, doesn't like to depend on others
Anxious
= Feels that others are reluctant to get as close, worries that the partner doesn't really love them
Social Exchange Theory
Erich Fromm
"Love is often nothing but a favourable exchange between two people who get the most of what they can expect, considering their value on the market"
How people feel about a relationship depends on their assessments of its costs & rewards
Typically, people prefer interactions/relationships in which the rewards exceed the costs
Comparison Level:
Outcomes people think they deserve or expect to get from a relationship (high comp. level expect a lot from their relationships)
Equity Theory:
People are also motivated to pursue fairness, or equity in relationships such that the ratio of rewards to costs is similar for both partners
Imago Theory/Therapy (Hendrix)
Explains
why
we choose a specific partner -
Resemblance
with our parents, especially negative features --> Chance to heal childhood wounds
Studied relationships - e.g. if one of the parents are controlling, you're likely to have a partner who's controlling
Relational Self Theory (Anderson)
We build representations of ourselves in
interactions
with others (who I am when relating to my brother)
When relational selves are activated - e.g. by people who remind us of prior sig. others we tend to behave in the some way
Relational Dialectics (Baxter)
Relationships involve
tensions
E.g. one wants to be alone the other wants to spend time together
Mismatch --> relationship breakdown
Negotiation through communication
Relationsgips in
constant flux
Types of Relationships
Basis of all relationships falls into one of these categories
Clark & Mills
Communal Sharing:
Long-term bonds in which people feel responsible for each other - interactions governed by the needs principle --> e.g. child-parent
Exchange Relationships:
Short term relationships, in which individuals feel no responsibility towards one another --> Giving & receiving are governed by concerns about equity & reciprocity --> e.g. interactions between strangers
Fiske
Authority Ranking
Hierarchy, e.g. army
Moral judgements guided by principles of obedience & respect
Equility Matching:
Reciprocity, e.g. roommates
Work governed by principles of sameness - justice from equality
Market Pricing:
Input = output, e.g. at work
Morality is governed by concerns over efficiency & utility
Interpersonal Attraction (SPAMARA)
Physical Arousal
Men like 6:8 hip to waist ratio --> strong emotional states = sexual attraction
Men who expected strong shocks = women more attractive
Misattribution =
ANY strong emotions, even negative, might be
confused for attraction
whenever an appropriate object of affection is present
Proximity/Exposure
physical proximity influences whether people develop relationships
Mere exposure effect:
The more we are exposed to something the more we like it
Students rated another new student as more attractive the more they saw her
Similarity
People tend to prefer those who are similar to themselves
Married couples are quite similar (characteristics) -->
Students like people they are most similar to
For most features, opposites DO NOT attract
Reciprocal Liking
We like those we think like us
Physical Attractiveness
We want to be close to people who are
attractive
Averageness & bilateral symmetry = Physically attractive
Evolved to like health & reproductive fitness
Confederates rated as more likeable, friendly & confident when girlfriend was attractive --> No effect if female was not his girlfriend
Ambient Factors
Stressful background factors e.g. heat or overcrowding --> reduced attractiveness of stranger
Matching Hypothesis (Goffman)
Likely to form
long standing relationships
with those
equally matched social attributes
e.g. physical attractiveness
Own attractiveness acts as a moderating influence on date selection
Levels of attraction between partners
tend to match
Romantic Relationships & Love
Types of Love
Passionate:
Intense longing
Physiological arousal
Great fulfilment
NEW relationships
Companionate:
Intimacy & affection
Deep care
Not necessarily passion or arousal
Mature
Stenberg's Triangle of Love
All crucial in characterising different types of love
Triangle = Passion, commitment, intimacy
Romantic love
= Passion & intimacy
Companionate love
= Commitment & intimacy
Love & Marriage
Romantic love not always a
prerequisite to marriage
= New
Mutual love rated lower in
arranged marriage
Relationship Dissatisfaction & Break Up
Predictors:
Neuroticism, sensitivity to rejection, lower SES, financial & work-related problems, marrying young
Idealisation:
PPs who rated their partner higher on several traits than themselves --> More satisfied
Playfulness:
Marital satisfaction returns to pre-children levels when children
leave home
--> lack of novel joint activities
Divorce is contagious -->
Dissatisfaction
Unequal chore division --> Dissatisfaction
Watching romantic movies - woman being slimmer than the man --> dissatisfaction