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EQ (Social Awareness (Watch body language (Always take into account…
EQ
Social Awareness
Adopt "right place, right time" concept.
Careful placement of questions and responses to control situation and emotional reaction.
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Watch body language
Always take into account context.
Three types of limbic respones to threat or distress: Fight, flight, freeze.
Often followed by pacifying behaviours.
Detect pacifying behaviours to see when someone has reacted negatively to situation.
Read people in reverse - legs to face instead of face to legs.
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Don't take notes at meetings.
No opportunity for observation.
You will miss emotional cues and tone of the room.
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Practice EQ when watching movies.
Observe character interactions, relationships, and conflicts.
Body language -> how each character is feeling.
How character handles conflict.
As more information about character unfolds, rewatch to spot clues you missed previously
Practice the art of listening.
Don't just listen to content. Listen to tone, speed, volume of the voice, which likely reflect speaker's frame of mind.
Find hidden messages in differentials.
What is being said vs what is not being said.
Choice of words doesn't match tone, speed, or volume.
Never multitask when someone is talking to you.
Convey interest to ressure speaker. Don't fake it.
Nodding, raising eyebrows, leaning forward.
"I see", "That's interesting", "Tell me more about that"
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Understand the culture.
Ethnic culture, business culture, family culture.
Specific rules of the culture you're in.
e.g. workplace culture.
Treat others how they want to be treated, not how you want to be treated.
Collect multiple observations before jumping to conclusions.
Just ask.
Sometimes there is too much activity to get a good reading.
Ask if what you're observing is actually what's happening.
- State what you're seeing. (it looks like you are feeling down about something)
- Ask a direct question. (did something happen?)
You will likely hear whatever he wants you to know for now; but you've reached out and let him know that you are interested.
Step into their shoes.
Actor.
"If I were this person..."
To answer this, use your previous history with the person: how he's reacted in similar situations (how did he act, what did he say)
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