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Jing-Yi Liu's Personality Islands (Apprehension Island (I REALLY…
Jing-Yi Liu's Personality Islands
Apprehension Island
I REALLY don't like the word "challenge", because in my experience it tends to mean "impossible"
I tend to do just well enough in competitions to be totally invested in them, but just poorly enough to miss any placements/titles/awards
Can be more like paranoia at times, but in my opinion it's justified. It feels like the universe is watching me constantly and going "hmmm, how can this person's life get worse?"
I've been tricked enough times by thinking I had the afternoon free, or thinking I won something, or thinking someone meant something, or thinking something is true, that I don't trust positive outcomes anymore
Fear is definitely my dominant emotion
From my perspective, it seems like people are always on the verge of snapping at me, so it's hard to tell when they actually are on the verge of snapping at me
Isolation Island
The only time I feel safe, relaxed, and not judged, and not worry about what I'm doing or what impression I'm giving
I need at least an hour before bed to just relax, otherwise I can't sleep (which is a problem when sleep is so rare at IA already)
Pairs well with the dark, music, pacing, and (maladaptive?) daydreams
I used to jump on the bed instead of pace, which worked better, but I kept destroying the mattresses, and after I spent 2 weeks in China with non bouncy mattresses, I learned to pace instead
Mom Island
The only constant in my life, besides fear
The only member of my family I can tolerate, but still frustrates me a lot
Has said that she will love me unconditionally no matter what I do or what happens to me
A previous college math teacher, she's been my moral support at least for 11+ years, and the main reason I'm doing well in math today
Internet Island
By far my main source of entertainment
Started when I was little and my mom had frequent business meetings at home, so I had to entertain myself quietly, which meant pirating TV shows and headphones
My laptop is my baby, and I'm nearly 100% positive I would save it from a fire before myself
I'm pretty well versed in internet culture, which basically means I know how conducive it is to bullying, and I hate it, but I also like how it makes it easier to stand up to bullies
I used to play tons of MMOs, since I liked watching my numbers increase, but ever since about 7th grade I haven't had any time for it
Story Island
I'm of the opinion that life is just a really poorly written TV show that has way too many characters and plotlines, and isn't planned well
I often empathize with fictional characters more than "real" people
I'm trying to write my own story(s), and I even joined Creative Writing Club, but I don't have any time for that anymore
Ironically, most of the stories I like are really poorly written, which makes it harder to write, because I have a harder time grasping how certain techniques are better
My favorite part about writing is creating characters, motivations, personalities, and relationships. I also like making complicated plots. World building? I'm terrible at that. Feels too much like researching for history, which I hate
Still, I'm always frustrated with Literature class, because I'm never engaged by the books, I rarely get a chance to write something of my own, and we never analyze the interesting part; the plot!