CHAPTER 11 Communication Climate (How communication climates develop…
CHAPTER 11 Communication Climate
What is communication climate?
Refers to the social tone of a relationship.
Just like neighborhoods, cities and towns, and countries can be defined by their social tones.
Like their meteorological counterparts, communication climates are shared by everyone involved. Its rare to find one person describing a relationship as open and posiive while another as cold and hostile
A relationship can overcast at one timeand sunny at another. Carrying the analogy to its conclusio, we should say that communication climat forecasting is not perfect science.
How communication climates developehow and why we respond so defensively.
How communication climates develop
Confirming communication to describe messages that convey valuing
In one form or another, confirming messages say "you exist" or "you matter"
Disconfirming communication signals a lack of regard. In one form it may say "I dont care about you" or "I dont like you"
Its hard to overstate the importance of confirming messages and the impact of disconfirming ones.
Children who lack confirmation suffer a broad range of emotional and behavioral problems, wheras those who feel confirmed have more open communication with parents, higher self esteem, and lower stress levels.
The interpretation of a message as confirming or disconfirming is subjective. For example when you took a comment that may have sounded unsupporive to an outsider like "your such a nerd" as a sighn of affection in the relationship.
The most fundamental act of confirmation is to recognize the other person, it seems easy but is often failed.
A disagreeing message essentially says "youre wrong". in its most contstructive form, disagreement includes two of the confirming components recognition and aknolegment.
Impervious response: fails to acknowledge the other persons communicative attempt, either verbal or nonverbal.
Creating Supportive Climates
Even the most postive message isnt guaranteed to create a positive climate.
Because human communication is so complex, there arnt any foolproof words, phrases, or formulas for creating positive climates.
Do the climate threatening properties of evaluative messages mean that it is impossible to register a legitimate complaint? no.
Description is a way to offer your thoughts, feelings, and wants without judging the listener for their views.
Controlling communication: occurs when a sender seems to be imposing a solution on the receiver with little regard for that persons needs or interests.
Problem orientation: communicators focus on finding a solution that satisfies both their own needs and those of the others involved.
Spontaneity: the behavior that constrasts with strategy. It means to be honest with others rather than manipulating them.
Invitational communication: an approach that welcomes others to see your own point of view and to freely share their own.
In an invitational climate, communicatoras offer ideas without coercion, they listen to ideas with an open mind, they exchange ideas without pressure.
In contrast to these uncivil approaches, many of the skillls described in this book perception checking, responsible language, responsive listening are rooted in an invitational approach to interpersonal communication.
Notice how this list describes choices instead of obligations
The response of seeking more information makes good sence whyen you realize that its foolish to respond to a critical atttack until you understand what the other person said.
Invitational communicators not only extend freedom to others, but htey exersise it themselves.