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Chapter 11 Communication Climate (Creating Supportive Climates (Strategy…
Chapter 11 Communication Climate
What Is Communication Climate?
Communication climate is the social tone of a relationship. It's not the specific activities they are doing but more so the way the feel about each other while doing the activity. Like the weather, the communication climate changes.
How Communication Climates Develop
Defensiveness
Defensiveness is protecting yourself from attacks, its protecting our "face". We do this when we are confronted with face-threatening acts (messages that we perceive as challenging the image we want to project.
Climate Patterns
When the communication climate has formed it takes on a life of it's own and the responses to it are similar in both of the people. Spiral is a reciprocal pattern and can be both positive and negative.
Levels of Message Confirmation
The different levels can be classified by confirming, disagreeing, and disconfirming. Confirming messages are Endorsement (you agree with them or find them important), acknowledgment (listening to their ideas and feelings), recognition (recognizing and responding to them). Disagreeing message says "you're wrong". Disconfirming messages are not as blunt as disagreeing but can be more damaging (can send the message that you don't value).
Creating Supportive Climates
Strategy versus Spontaneitey
Strategy is a defense-arousing message, speakers hide their ulterior motive, dishonest and manipulation. Even if it is a positive strategic communication, the victim will likely feel offended at being played for a sucker. Spontaneity is the behavior that contrasts with strategy, being honest with others rather than manipulating them.
Neutrality versus Empathy
Neutrality arouses defensiveness, Indifference. Neutral attitude is disconfirming because it communicates a lack of concern and implies that the other person isn't very important to you. Empathy helps rid communication of the quality of indifference. Empathy is showing the other person that the care for the feelings of the other.
Control versus Problem Orientation
Controlling communication is when a sender seems to be imposing a solution on the receiver with little regard for that person's needs or interests. Control generates hostility. Problem orientation is when the communicators focus on finding a solution that satisfies both their own needs and those of the others involved.
Superiority versus Equality
Superiority is patronizing messages that irritate receivers and ranges from young to seniors. If the message suggests that they are better than you it is a superiority message. Equality is seen in many people who have superior skills and talents but don express superiority, they see other people as having just as much worth as themselves.
Evaluation versus Description
Evaluation is a type of defense-arousing message, it judges the other person in a negative way (normally). Description is a way of offering your thought, feelings, and wants without judging the listener. Description makes observations that are specific and concrete.
Certainty versus Provisionalism
Certainty is a defense-arousing behavior. When they view their opinions with certainty and others ideas are disregarded shows a lack of regard fro other, and the receiver will most likely react defensively. Provisionalism is when people may have strong opinions but are willing to acknowledge that they don't have a corner on the truth and will change their stand if another position seems more reasonable.
Invitational Communication
The Language of Choice
Should be choices not obligations. The wording focuses on decisions made, not grudging acquiescence. The difference in wording can be empowering. Don't word it so you are accusing others.
Responding Nondefensively to Criticism
Ways to not respond defensively is by seeking more information and agreeing with the critic. The response of seeking more information helps you to understand what the other person means/said. Simply ask them to explain or ask for the specifics. You can agree with the critic by agreeing with the truth. You can accept the principle. Listen carefully and ask questions to make sure you understand the objections, but if it still seems totally out of line, you can just agree with the critic's perception.