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:star: The Will Power Instinct summary :star: (will power expriement (1.1.…
:star: The Will Power Instinct summary :star:
The last word
strengthen self-awareness and self-control
put energy on self-control and recover from stress,not self-defense
3.the self-control paradox: we cannot control everything, yet we need to push our limits
4.we need to identify the goal itself, not the halo glow we get from being good
5.when dopamine point us to temptation, we must distinguish wanting from happiness
discover what really makes us feel better-- not the false promise of reward, and not empty promises to change. self-compassion is far better than self-criticism
7.when we contemplate the future, our imagination fail us in predictable ways
our brain incoporate the goals, beliefs and actions of others into our decisions
accept what comes to your mind and choose what you can act on
the importance of self-acceptance and self-awareness
chapter summary
willpower=I will, I won't and I want
2.willpower is to help us protect ourselves from ourselves
self-control is like a muscle. it gets tired from use, but regular exercise makes it stronger
4.when we turn willpower challenges into the measures of moral worth, being good gives permission to be bad.
For better self control, forget virtue and focus on goals and value
our brain mistake the promise of reward for a guarantee of happiness, so we chase satisfaction from things that do not deliver
feeling bad leads to giving in, and dropping guilt makes you stronger
our inability to clearly see the future clearly leads us into temptation and procrastination
self-control is influenced by social proof, making both willpower and temptation contagious
trying to suppress thoughts, emotions, and cravings backfires
be curious, try and learn
under the microscope
1.1. what's the harder thing?-- what makes it hard
1.2. meet your two minds:---the impulsive version vs. the wiser version
2.1. what is the threat? identify the inner pulse that needs to be restrained
2.2. stress and self-control. ---Notice and pay attention when it happens
3.1. the highs and lows of willpower
3.2. is your exhaustion real? --go beyond the first feeling of fatigue to take one more step
4.1. virtue and vice. -if you have been good ,do you give yourself permission to be do something bad ?
4.2. Are you borrow credit from tomorrow?-do you tell yourself you will make up for today's behavior tomorrow?
4.3. halo effects. ---Do you justify a vice because of virtuous aspect(e.e discount savings ect.)
4.4 who do you think you are? --the part of you who wants to pursue the goal, or the part you who needs to be controlled?
5.1. what gets your dopamine neurons firing? --what compels to seek satisfaction?
5.2. the stress of desire. --notice when wanting trigger stress and anxiety
6.1. the promise of relief .--what do you turn to when you are stress
6.2. what's terrifying you?--pay attention to the source of your stress
6.3. resolving to feel good.-- Do you fantasies your future self to fix your feeling now, more than take concrete steps to fix your behavior now?
7.1. how are you discounting future rewards?
7.2. are you waiting for future you? --putting off important change?
7.3. are you too farsighted for your good?--do you find it more difficult to indulge than ti resist temptation?
8.1. your social network 2. who are you mirroring 3. who are most likely to catch something from? 4.But Ma, everyone else is doing it!
9.1. investigate ironic rebound. 9.2. what's on your most-wanted list
will power expriement
1.1. track your willpower choice
1.2. five-minute braining-training meditation--focus on the breath
2.1. breath you way to self-control, slow down breath to six time per minute
2.2. the five-minute green willpower fill-up--go outdoors, hiking
2.3. Zzzzz-get enough sleep!
2.4. relax to restore your willpower reserve--lie down, breath deeply
3.1. the willpower diet--fueled with food for body energy
3.2. a willpower workout-pick one thing(I will) to do or not do(I won't) or keep tracking something that you lack attention to
3.3. find your "want " power-the motivation
4.1.. to revoke your license, remember why! --Think about why you were "good", not whether you deserve a reward
4.2. A tomorrow just like today--aim to reduce the variability of your behavior day to day
5.1.dopaminize your "I will" power challenge--link something you've been putting off to what gets your dopamine neurons firing
5.2. test the promise of reward--mindfully indulge in something your brain tells you will make you happy but never seems to satisfy. Does the reality matches?
6.1.self-relief strategies that work. --go hiking, outdoors, meditation
6.2. forgiveness when you fail-self -compassion, give yourself permission to be a human
6.3. optimistic pessimism for successful resolutions--predict how and when you might temp to break your vow, and set a plan to avoid it
7.1. wait ten minutes--for any temptation
7.2. lower your discount rate
7.3. precommit your future self
7.4 meet your future self--write a letter to future self
8.1. strengthen your immune system -thing about your day when woke up
8.2. catch self-control--think of what your role model will do
8.3. the power of pride--go public with your willpower challenges
8.4.make it a group project--enlist otthers
9.1. feel what you feel, but don't believe everything you think
9.2. accepting those cravings-just don't act on them
9.3. surf the urge