Verbal Messages (Guidelines for using verbal messages effectively (Update…
Guidelines for using verbal messages effectively
Update messages: Avoid static evaluation
Update messages regularly; nothing is static (same) the tendency to describe the world in static terms, denying constant change. To combat static evaluation, recognize the inevitability to change; date statements and evaluations, realizing, for example that Gerry Smith (2006) is not Gerry Smith (2010)
Recognize complexity: Avoid Allness
Avoid illness: see the individual, our tendency to describe the world in extreme terms that imply we know all or are saying all there is to say: to combat illness, remind you that you can never know all or say all about anything; use a mental and sometimes "etc."
Talk about the middle: Avoid Polarization
Talk with middle terms the tendency to describe the world in terms of extremes of polar opposites. To combat polarization use middle terms and qualifiers.
Extensionalize: Avoid intensional orientation
Extensionalize: the word is not the thing. Avoid intensional orientation, the tendency to view the world in the way it's talked about or labeled. Instead, respond to things first; look the labels second.
Discriminate among: Avoid indiscrimination
Discriminate among, the, the tendency to group unique individuals or items because they're covered by the same term or label.
Distinguish between facts and inferences: Avoid fact-inference confusion
and act differently depending on whether the message is factual or inferential.
Principles of verbal messages
Message meanings vary in assertiveness
Acting assertively is most often the preferred
mode of communication, but attitudes toward
assertiveness vary greatly with the culture.
Message can deceive
refers to the act of sending messages with the intention of giving another person information you believe to be false
Involves some kind of verbal/ nonverbal message sending
The message must be sent to intentionally deceive
Acting with a truth bias is usually appropriate,
but realize that, in some situations, messages
may be false and may be purposely designed to
Message meanings are in people
In order to uncover the meanings you must look at what words mean to people, not just the words themselves.
Bypassing—common pattern of miscommunication where two people use different words with the same meaning, or when two people use the same words but have different meanings for those words.
Message meanings vary in politeness
polite messages reflect positively on the other person
politeness messages respect the other person's right to be independent/ autonomous
impolite messages attack our needs to be seen positively
Use messages that reflect positively on others
and allow them to be autonomous.
Meanings are denotative and connotative
Look at both the objective meaning and the
Messages can be onymous or anonymous
The Internet has made anonymity extremely
easy, and there are currently
a variety of websites
that offer to send messages all anonymously. Thus,
gets sent but you are not identified
with it. For good or ill, you don't have to deal with the
consequences of your message
Confirmation and disconfirmation
language that communicates inferiority of a particular racial or ethnic group.
obvious and subtle forms of language that disparages homosexual people.
prejudice against other age groups
use the preferred cultural identifiers to avoid racist, heterosexist, ageist, and sexist language.
language that puts down someone because of his or her gender