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Don't Jaloss Me (Step 1: Identify Triggers (When he finds other girls…
Don't Jaloss Me
Step 1: Identify Triggers
When he likes their pictures
Stop keeping track on social media
Recognise that he is making the decision not to do this anymore
It is just a like - no shady messaging or comments. I notice it more than he or she does.
When he follows/friends girls
Stop keeping track on social media - it's a numbers game
He should be free to meet new people, as I am
I want him to be well-rounded, and people are a part of that
When he finds other girls attractive
Recognise that I find other guys attractive - at least he's always open and honest about it - I want him to KEEP THAT WAY
He has his own insecurities e.g. height, build
He has never actually told me I didn't look good, whereas I have said I don't think his hair/facial hair looks good, which must be more difficult
I know his types anyway, so we both know who he'll find hot - I prefer that he tells me than closes down
When I'm reminded of past encounters
Before me: He owed nobody anything and has repeatedly said this means more in so many ways
Since meeting me: He was interested in me and I said no to him and he respected my reasons, so got on with his life
After summer: he was open in how he felt and I said I still wasn't ready to date. In a way, I was expecting him not to date but wasn't prepared to date him either.
Once I told him I was ready, the arguments were the hesitation, which is understandable
Step 2: Tackle Jealousy from within
Build Inner Confidence
Reasons why I'm a catch
I'm beautiful
I'm funny
I'm a kind/compassionate person
I'm intelligent
I'm wise
I'm interesting to talk to
I'm sociable and good with new people
I'm morally sound
I'm cool and well-travelled and multi-lingual
I'm good at writing and calligraphy
I'm politically aware
Have my own life
Separate friends
Separate relationships
with mutual friends
Own hobbies
Start own projects
Plan own travel
Remember why he is with me
Because we ARE best friends
Because he admires me as a person
Because he's got great taste ahah
Because I know him well
Because when we're good, we're great
Because he had feelings for the old me - get back to that
Avoid comparing to others
Do the Opposite of what a Jealous Person would do
Recognise that the Paranoia is unfounded
The scenarios in my mind are my projections, not reality
I am becoming less attractive by being paranoid
He has to deal with more, and is not paranoid:
setups
parents not even acknowledging him as an option
me keeping this a secret
guys hitting on me
me going for dinner with male friends
Step 3: Trust
Step 4: Let Go
Have Reasonable Expectations