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WIF Understanding Family (Definition (common features (residence, intimacy…

- - - - open family
    - - random family (only a little difference between family and nonfamily space)
    - - rigid subsystem boundaries:arrow_right: lack of relatedness among subsystems :arrow_right: lack of flexibility in division of labour
      - emotional cut-off
    - - unclear subsystem boundaries :arrow_right: lack of differentiation of function (role allocation) :arrow_right: easy to overwhelmed by emotions
      - differentiation of self
        
        balance emotional and intellectual functioning
        
        balance intimacy and autonomy in relationships
        
        Emotionally reactive :frowning_face:
        
        difficult to remain calm in response to the emotionality
        
        I Position :smiley:
        
        clearly defined sense of self and adhere to personal convictions
        
        Fusion (opp of I-Position) :frowning_face:
        
        Highly fused persons remain emotionally stuck in preoccupation with their families of origin, comply to family :arrow_right: seek acceptance and approval
        
        Emotional Cut-off :frowning_face:
        
        tend to deny the importance of family
  - - - clarity of msg, pattern of verbal and nonverbal communication
      - concordance within the content of msg (double-blind)
      - presence of scapegoat, family taboos
      - Satir Coping Stance (context,self,other)
        
         討好型 (placating)
         責備型 (blaming)
         超理型 (super-reasonable)
         打岔型 (irrelevant)
         一致型 (congruent)
  - - - traditional/formal: child as student/helper
      - Ascribed/Informal: hero,
        victim, scapegoat, good child, black sheep
- - - - Relatedness , Identification , Affirmation , socialization to belief systems , norms, and cultural values etc.
- - - - co-parenting
  - - - tasks
        
        Committing to the relationship
        Formulating roles and rules
        Separating from family of origin (yet, stay connected)
        Compromises and negotiating around concrete and personal needs
        (establishing appropriate social and personal boundary, degree of togetherness and individuation, hierarchy)
      - Risks
        
        Too enmesh to family of origin
        In-law conflict
        Lack of flexibility to compromise
        Lack of negotiating skills
        Lack or fear of commitment (value of marriage, unresolved dating or family history which impede level of trust)
        Unrealistic expectation of marriage
      - Crisis
        
        Marital conflicts or divorce
      - Services
        
        Per-marital counseling / marital counseling
    - - tasks
        
        Restabilizing the couple unit with a triangle
        Bonding with child
        Balance between child rearing and career
      - Risks
        
        Child being triangulated into marital conflict
        Role strains
        Attachment difficulty of child
        Difficulties on dealing with grandparents and maids involving in child care
      - Crisis
        
        Pre and post natal depression
        Extra-marital relationship
        Child neglect and abuse
      - Services
        
        Child care service
        Assistance on child care for parents
        Parenting course
        Family friendly work environment and culture
    - - Tasks
        
        Allowing greater independence of children
        Proper schooling of children
        Opening family boundaries to accommodate new social institutions and new people
        Understanding and accepting of role changes
      - Risks
        
        Role conflict of child care and career demand
        Cooperate with in-law parents on child care
        Academic demand of children (esp. for SEN children)
        Aging grand-parents requiring intense family care
        Difference between couple on parenting
        Middle age of parents with declining physical strengths (for couple who get married late)
      - Crisis
        
        marital conflicts intensify
        over load of parents
        physical illness of grandparents
        child / elderly abuse
      - Services
        
        Children and youth centre
        Parenting course and counseling
        After school programs
        Elderly services
    - - Tasks
        
        Dealing with teen demands for independence through appropriate boundary adjustments
        Adjusting to a new definition of personal autonomy (learning of let go yet with guidance and support)
        Rule changes, limit setting , and role negotiation
      - Risks
        
        Identity crisis of youth
        Rebellious behaviours of teen
        Parent-child relationship problem
      - Crisis
        
        Juvenile delinquents
        School drop out
        Addiction problem of teens
        Home run away
      - Services
        
        Parents support group
        Outreaching services for youth
        Involvement of youth in community services
        Drug prevention / addiction prevention or treatment programs
    - - Tasks
        
        Preparing young persons for independent living through schooling and job skills
        Accepting and promoting these youths’ self sufficiency
      - Risks
        
        Empty nest of parents especially mother,
        more demanding on father, potential marital conflict
      - Services
        
        Academic and career counseling for youth
        Job and study opportunity for young people
        Marital counseling
    - - Tasks
        
        Readjusting families to accommodate children returning home as young adult children
        Dealing with couple issues
        Renegotiating personal and physical space
        Renegotiating role responsibilities
      - Risks
        
        Children fail to be independent
        Cut off relationship with children
        Marital conflict
      - Crisis
        
        Co-dependency relationship between parent and adult child
      - Services
        
        Housing for young people
        Marital counseling and marital enrichment
    - - Risks
        
        Adjustment to retirement
        Death and dying of grandparents
        Mid-life crises of parents (evaluation of life)
        Marital conflicts and extra-marital relationship problem
      - Tasks
        
        Adjusting to new roles and relationship not centred on children
      - Crisis
        
        Divorce
        Depression
      - Services
        
        Community involvement of retired persons
        Life coaching for retired person for retirement life
        Marital counseling and enrichment
    - - Tasks
        
        Involvement with grandchildren and partners of the children
        Dealing with issues and difficulties of aging
        Striving to maintain dignity, meaning, and independence
      - Risks
        
        Facing ill health and death
        Financial difficulties
      - Crisis
        
        Depression and suicide
        Elderly abuse
      - Services
        
        Elderly centre
        Health care
        Financial assistance
        Preparation of ‘good dying’
        Social respect to elderly
- - - - understand the ambivalence of change and
        power
      - facilitate their strengths and lower down their
        anxiety and barriers to growth and change
      - help every family member recognize the
        importance and meaning of changes to
        individuals and family as a whole
  - - - Involve as many family members as possible
      - Relate to the family as a whole rather than to particular family member
      - Establish the rules of communication
      - Help the family members to talk to each other
      - Discourage hidden message and double-blind messages
      - no one speaks for anybody else
      - specific about the person to whom
        a communication is addressed
      - Rephrase the accusations,underlying wish
        for relatedness and self-affirmation
      - Regulate irrelevant responses
    - - Elicit what behaviors the parents want from their children
      - Clarify whether the parenting means are successful in obtaining the desired responses
      - Redefine the parental directives to a child --> as an expression of parental concern
      - clarify the rationale behind their directives
      - move the parental child back to a child’s role
      - Strengthen functioning by improving marital relationship:
        gratify and support each other