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Discussing the Undiscussable (Ladder of Influence (Monitor our own…
Discussing the Undiscussable
Before you can say out loud what you truly think and feel, you must develop an aware- ness of when your thinking becomes toxic and worthy of censorship.
Defensive emotional responses, trying to keep control. "Undiscussable"
Instances of threat/embarrassment can be seen as a way to learn, accepting you might contribute to the problem can help as well.
"Progress"
Advocacy and Inquiry
Inquiry: Asking well crafted questions to inquire into others thoughts/reasons. Pro: Faster discovery, resolutions. STRENGTHEN: actively encourage a challenging view point.
Advocacy: Spoken statements allow one to understand the importance of other's feelings/actions, completed by self for self. Pro:Agile/innovative ideas. STRENGTHEN: offer an example!
Ladder of Influence
Monitor our own thoughts/feelings to conclude our own reasonable basis.
Enables people to understand the other persons thoughts and actions, while focusing on the issue at hand.
Foster greater inclusion of diverse thinking.
What conclusions are we drawing?
Bottom: Select Date, Middle:Interpret Date, Top:Draw a conclusion.
The "Left Hand Column"
Honest Discussion of Issues, monitor thoughts and feelings
Process thoughts/feelings to open a conversation of productive dialogue.
Requires healthy distrust of one's owns feelings, to allow for the open conversation and eventual change.
After the fact reflection.
"The ‘first loop’ is the common rapid-fire approach to solving problems – namely, to react by changing the course of action when some- thing doesn’t work. The often-neglected ‘second loop’ goes beyond this to take into account the thinking, values and assumptions behind all the actions." Page 19.