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Matt's Parented Experience (Me (Had ADHD growing up (Had social…
Matt's Parented Experience
Parents
Close/Loving Relationship
Have similar priorities
Spending time as a family and with kids was a big deal to both of them
Had the same parenting styles
Both believed in authoritative parenting
Parents agreed on types of discipline to be used on children
Older age when they got married (mom was 40 and dad 38)
Have good commuinication
Mom (Pam)
FOO
Youngest child with 2 siblings
5 years between each sibling
Only girl so was treated different than her brothers
Grew up on a Farm doing chores all day
Parents valued hard work
Parents were Authoritarian parenting style
Parents believed in physical punishments when she was growing up
Parenting Styles
Authoritative parenting style
Disipline
Believed in using lessons and time outs for punishment
Strongly against using physical punishments
I am the youngest by 9 years and also her only biological child so I have always had a closer relationship with her than the others and she shows slight favoritism for me also knowing what its like growing up much younger than your siblings
Dad (John)
FOO
Oldest of 6 siblings
Grew up having to take care of younger siblings a lot
Parents were extremely authoritarian /univolved
Grow up on a farm
Had to help with farming and do chores around the farm
Parents believed in hitting as punishment
was used as a sort of surrogate parent for siblings when growing up especially the younger ones
Parenting Style
Authoritative parenting style
Dad focused on creating equality between all 3 os us kids
Disipline
Dad was also strongly against physical punishment of kids
Culture and History
Church was very important
Raised lutheran and went to church every Sunday and sunday school and youth group and volunteering through church
race and sexual orientation were nonfactors
Most of my parents friends were of a different race then us (white) and most of them were also gay which subjected me to many life styles growing up
Taught to not care about things like race and sexual orientation
Emphasis on egalitarian beliefs instilled in everyone from early age
Ancestry and tradition important
Dad is really into ancestry and has spent a lot of time workin on family history and made everyone get involved in it
Following traditions of past generations was a big deal growing up especially holidays
Mom grew up lower class, dad grew up middle class
Different values about spending money
Mom was much more okay with spending money than dad was especially on frivolous things
Me
Extroverted
Love being around people
Spent a lot of time alone though when I was young because of things from my ADHD which I struggled with because I love being around people
Created depression at a young age
Was the only sibling who didn't get in trouble with the law growing up
wanted to be seen as better than my siblings
Dedicated to school
was in the top 5% of my graduating class
Had ADHD growing up
Had problems in school and paying attention in classes
Issues with getting in trouble for talking to much
Got in trouble a lot for impulsive behaviors when I was younger
Had social issues making friends
Cycled through friends very quickly
Have extreme anxiety and OCPD
struggle to do many "normal" things in my life
FOO
Parents were different religions growing up
Dad eventually converted to lutheranism when I was 10 because thats what my mom was
Grew up with different relies beliefs and siblings and dad going to different churches
Siblings are still catholic
I have 2 half siblings and I am the youngest and only child of my mother (all share same father)
My brother is 13 years older and my sister 9 years older than me
My brother got into lots of trouble growing up
By the time I was in 5th grade only child left at home and was given more lienient rules than siblings were
Mom was a middle school counselor
Made talking to my mom growing up always feel like I was in a therapists office which made it hard to open up to mother growing up about certain things but also easier for other topics
Made sure everyone in the family displayed good communication and shared their feelings openly
Family time very important growing up
Had to be home for dinner every night and everyone would have to share about their days around the dinner table
Spent a lot of time with my dad's family on the farm growing up and doing things with my dad's siblings and their kids
Spent holidays, birthdays, football games, many weekends and such where we had to be with them