Listening (Barriers to Effective Listening (Sympathizing rather than…
Listening is the ability to accurately receive and interpret messages in the communication process.
Studies have shown that, whereas speaking raises blood pressure, listening brings it down
Discriminative listening is first developed at a very early age – perhaps even before birth, in the womb. This is the most basic form of listening and does not involve the understanding of the meaning of words or phrases but merely the different sounds that are produced.
Comprehensive listening involves understanding the message or messages that are being communicated.
Informational Listening: Whenever you listen to learn something, you are engaged in
critical listening when the goal is to evaluate or scrutinize what is being said
Emphatic listening involves attempting to understand the feelings and emotions of the speaker
Appreciative listening is listening for enjoyment
When trying to build rapport with others we can engage in a type of listening that encourages the other person to trust and like
A salesman, for example, may make an effort to listen carefully to what you are saying as a way to promote trust and potentially make a sale.
Listening is Not the Same as Hearing
Hearing refers to the sounds that you hear, whereas listening requires more than that: it requires focus
EXAMPLE: Adults spend an average of 70% of their time engaged in some sort of communication, of this an average of 45% is spent listening compared to 30% speaking, 16% reading and 9% writing.
Barriers to Effective Listening
other types of ineffective listening lead to misunderstandings and a breakdown in communication
Trying to listen to more than one conversation at a time
You find the communicator attractive/unattractive
You are not interested
Feeling unwell or tired
Identifying rather than empathizing
Sympathizing rather than empathizing
You are prejudiced or biased
You have preconceived ideas or bias
You make judgments
Having a Closed Mind
Non-Verbal Signs of Ineffective Listening
Lack of eye contact with the speaker
An inappropriate posture
An inappropriate posture
Inappropriate expressions and lack of head nods
Further Signs of Ineffective Listening
Sudden Changes in Topic
Formulating a Response
Common Listening Misconceptions
Misconception One: It’s Difficult to Learn How to Listen
You are likely to see benefits in your social and personal life too – effective listening leads to a deeper understanding and you are likely to develop stronger and more meaningful relationships with others
Misconception Two: I’m a Good Listener
Good listening is not a skill that we are born with, it is not a natural gift. Without practice and training we are unlikely to be particularly effective listeners.
Misconception Three: Intelligent People are Better Listeners.
For example, very intelligent people may be more likely to get bored with a conversation and ‘tune out’, thinking about other things and therefore not listening.
Misconception Four: Hearing is the same as Listening
Hearing is a passive process - like breathing - we do it without thinking. Listening, however, is a learnt skill and an active process. Our brains have to work harder to process the information that we hear and see in order to understand the meaning of the message. Understanding is the goal of listening.
Misconception Five: We Listen Better As We Get Older
As confidence improves people tend to pick up bad habits – they are less likely to concentrate fully on their driving, the process becomes ‘automatic’.
Misconception Six: Gender Affects Listening Ability
Women tend to place a higher value on connection, cooperation and emotional messages, whereas men are generally more concerned with facts and may be uncomfortable talking about and listening to personal or emotional subjects.
7 types of responses to listening empathically
Advising, Judging, Analyzing, Questioning, Comforting/Supporting, Prompting, and Paraphrase
The 10 Principles of Listening
Stop Talking, Prepare Yourself to Listen, Put the speaker at ease, remove distractions, empathize, be patient, avoid personal prejudice, listen to the tone, Listen for ideas, Wait and watch for Non-verbal Comm.
Signs of Active Listening
Smile, Eye Contact, Posture, Mirroring, distraction,
Positive Reinforcement, Remembering, Questioning,