My Genogram, Looking back in order to move forward in LOVE (My and Bab…
My Genogram, Looking back in order to move forward in LOVE
Mommy always says that there was lots of love in her family. I'm hard pressed to see it though. Apart from her.
I see a lot of back biting and gossiping. I see jealousy and a posturing for position and authority. Conflict was not dealt with properly and it sowed seeds of division.Very often people conflict avoid but let the seeds grow
There was Leadership in Papa and Uncle Andrew but despite their excellence in hard work and achievement there was arrogance and physical abuse. These led to a lot of division that became more and more apparent as they passed.
Daddy spoke of the harships they had growing up with Ajee as a single mother. Their poverty was real after their father left them and his mother worked very hard to provide for them.
My Father in his own words described his father as a loner. He died by the river bank, I assumed it was somewhere in American Flats.
Uncle Soogrim and Uncle HArry left and went on their own beat.
I remember the abuse uncle Harry dished out to Daddy and to Ajee, There was even a time he came home by us and I remember him shouting at Amy.
Uncle Chilo was a businessman, but he too was a loner I think and there was the tragedy in his own family. The greed of Teddy maybe.
My own Father has an affinity for land and seems unable to let go of property ...There is a deep underlying fear there. Maybe that what they have will be taken from them, because their father gave away what they had.
Yet my Father has an exceptionally giving heart towards his family and the community in general. People lke him and look to hom because of his hard working nature and his honesty.
My mom continues to attest to his isolation, anger and his leaning towards unresolved conflict
Again like my mothers family my father take an unhealthy route to dealing with conflict
Its not all bad both sides of my family are capable of love and deep connection. As kids growing up, we had some fun times. My dad's family has show the ability to connect as well. But maybe we or at least I need to learn from my/our collective past and be able to gain my own identity and be able to let go and let God take control and maybe then the oppurtunity for reconcilliations can be possible.